The Modern Christmas Story

Mary was just playing a game on her Ipad, when suddenly her brand new blackberry torch rang. It was god! He told her that she was going to give birth to a king, so she quickly phoned her boyfriend Joseph and met him at Starbucks to tell him. Joseph was shocked and offered to marry Mary, she accepted his proposal. Because Mary spent all her money on baby clothes and appliances, she could not pay the rent to her house and left it. Joseph and Mary booked a plane to Israel, because Joseph had relatives to look after them there! After landing in Bethlehem Joseph and Mary took a hover car to Joseph’s relative’s house. The relatives were really mean and chucked the couple out of the house after 2 days only!

Joseph and Mary didn’t have any money left and found a small shed to sleep in. They survived mainly on leftovers from bins and sold their Ipad, Iphones, blackberries, and laptops, everything they didn’t need.

From all the profits they had made, they built a 5 star hotel and started a business. Soon after, Mary needed to have the baby and unfortunately there was no time to go to the hospital, therefore Jesus was born in the deluxe suite in Mary and Joseph’s hotel.

Far far away, in robot-land in Europe three wise robots were hired to go kill Jesus by Zeus the second as he wanted to be king forever and for no one EVER to have higher authority than him. Firstly the three wise robots didn’t agree but when he gave them robot-treats they finally agreed to do this horrible deed. After a 7 hour flight, this wasn’t too uncomfortable because the robots were on premium class. On arrival at the Bethlehem airport, they downloaded the tracking software to find Joseph and Mary’s hotel.

After having a boring ride in the grotesque hover-cars of Bethlehem, they arrived at the Mary-Joseph hotel. They checked in and not a long time after they used their powerlocks to break into the deluxe suite. Mary and Joseph questioned them for a long time, however the robots got their way and managed to go and see Jesus, they told each other that this baby was far too precious to be killed, so they gave him 3 gifts, an gold Ipad, a diamond laptop and the most important gift all the cloak of invisibility.

After 3 days, the 3 robots booked a spacecraft to Jupiter and left Earth for good. Jesus grew up and the king never knew what happened to the robots.

by Nassef Ghazi