The Modern Christmas Story

Mary sat in the car; Joseph was putting the luggage into the boot before they set off to Bethlehem. She sighed and recalled the news when the king, Herod had told every man and his wife and children to go to the mans birth place. Herod was an ok king but this was going a bit over the top.

Mary heard the boot slam shut and the crunching of gravel towards the driving seat; even though it was Mary’s car her pregnancy had made her a dangerous driver. Joseph sat in the car and started the engine and trundled down the road towards the huge sign glittering in the setting. ‘Bethlehem, the city of dreams’ it was like Las Vegas but even more touristy! Mary’s little mini drove onto the main road just as Mary leaped up. “Where will we stay we have no place to go in Bethlehem!” Joseph smiled, “I’ve got it all sorted, the room the free breakfasts, the lot.

Mary snuggled back down into her seat. Her car’s heating had broken the night before so Joseph and Mary both had blankets over their legs.

Soon enough the couple were in Bethlehem and Joseph turned the Sat Nav on. The woman’s voice droned on and Mary got bored so she changed it to John Cleese.  The comedian was the only bright time the couple had had in days.

The comedian made a funny comment as they reached their destination and Joseph turned him off.

“Now I have already called 5 other inns but this was apparently the only one with a room left.” Joseph started. “Well,” he started, “don’t expect a palace room.” The Inn keeper rushed out to them.

“I’m so sorry, but the room I took aside for you has been filled, first come first serve you know.” The couple’s disappointment softened his heart. “I have got a barn though, no charge” he said quickly. The couple’s eyes brightened as they went to the barn. It was huge with a kitchen and a bedroom upstairs. The Inn keeper left the couple with their luggage in the huge warm barn. Suddenly Mary fell to the floor.
“Call a doctor” she screamed “The baby’s coming!” Joseph grabbed his phone and called 999. His frustrated face told the story.
“Gridlock.”

6 hours later a beautiful baby was born, she called him Jesus, saviour.

A few meters away were 3 Sheppards watching their flocks at night while watching ITV, the angel of the lord came down and switched to BBC.

“Hey” cried one of the Shepard’s “we were watching that.” The angel gave him a quick look and got out his handheld computer and read out.

“Do not be afraid, I just have to tell you to go to Bethlehem. Travel Lodge inn, 43 street. The son of God is there.”
With that the angel imploded and went to who knows where.
So the Shepard’s travelled to Bethlehem and saw a neon sign saying “the son of God is here.”

The Sheppards rang the inn keeper’s door bell and were pointed to the barn. They knocked on the barn door and were led in. There he was the son of God. Having nothing more than bionic sheep they offered the sheep to Mary. She accepted.

Miles away there were 3 kings who loved ICT. They looked at the stars on their computers and noticed one shining object in the sky. They zoomed in. “Blimey” shouted one of them “it’s a neon sign!” It read, “Son of God is here”

Taking the neon sign as a heavenly sign they went to Bethlehem to give gifts of luck.
The most expensive memory ever: about the same amount of money as gold. Fabreeze: a lot like frankincense and a twig spoon made of myrrh. They knew they had pleased God.

The kings had been told to report where the baby was to King Herod so he could worship him.  Suddenly they got a text message, “Do not go to King Herod, He wants to kill the king!” The Kings decided to abide by the message and avoided King Herod.

A month later Joseph had a dream with an angel telling him “Leave Bethlehem, go to Egypt take Mary and Jesus with you!”

The next day the couple and the baby set off and stayed in a Downtown Cairo hotel in Egypt and as soon as they had got into the room Joseph turned the TV to the news and gasped.

“This is John Smith reporting from Bethlehem the streets are quiet now because of the bloodbath that has just finished, many baby boys have been shot to keep Herod on the throne, this is totally wrong.”

They had to be thankful, the lord had saved them and they would raise the baby and make him a wonderful gift to society.

This child would grow up to be a healer, our saviour Jesus Christ.                      

by Charlotte Lewis, year 8